1. Yes, had one long relationship before this (with someone who 'chased' me), and beyond that no other experience with women.
2. Yeah, as I said, before date 20, I also thought I was in the long haul.
3. Medicine/Law american born chinese with Math/Physics/CS american born chinese. She's very nerdy though, similar interest in history/science/math and similar sense of humor. With the first 19 girls I didn't really enjoy their company/conversation and so I was just going through the motions for sex and it probably showed.
4. Not a frat guy. Never got drunk / did drugs with friends, for example. No friends in college/grad school other than fellow stem nerds. Don't think I've ever made friends in the usual group social settings (sports, drinking, parties). Funnily enough I even have trouble with group settings at academic conferences - I'm very quiet in those settings. Much prefer 1-on-1, which suits OLD. Probably above average physically - like playing sports and work out regularly.
my experience as inexperienced-stem-phd: OLD was great for learning basic social skills such as choosing an appropriate activity, asking someone out, talking about myself, staying in communication, etc. Over the course of a year in NYC, I went on ~20 first dates, ~5 second dates and am now in a serious-ish relationship of a few months. I definitely felt that I was constantly improving over the course of this year, I cringe when I think of the things that I did early on. However I do also remember that it the first 19 dates seemed hopeless and did not think that I was close to getting into a serious relationship, it was really the matter of meeting the right person at the right time.
are you saying you didn't have much experience with dating prior to this short engagement with OLD?
20 dates to a relationship is pretty good, folks I had in mind with the "try something else" message often have been on this thing for years and years.
curious whether your current partner is quite similar to you (eg stem chinese phd dating stem chinese masters) or more different (eg stem jewish phd dating arts student chinese)?
curious where you'd put yourself in terms of social skills/emotional maturity in general? as in, some stem phds are on the spectrum and struggle getting more basic social connection protocols correctly, while some are upper-middle class americans who are quite well-adjusted and might've been to engineering frat etc.
No worries, happy to chat (and brag a little)
1. Yes, had one long relationship before this (with someone who 'chased' me), and beyond that no other experience with women.
2. Yeah, as I said, before date 20, I also thought I was in the long haul.
3. Medicine/Law american born chinese with Math/Physics/CS american born chinese. She's very nerdy though, similar interest in history/science/math and similar sense of humor. With the first 19 girls I didn't really enjoy their company/conversation and so I was just going through the motions for sex and it probably showed.
4. Not a frat guy. Never got drunk / did drugs with friends, for example. No friends in college/grad school other than fellow stem nerds. Don't think I've ever made friends in the usual group social settings (sports, drinking, parties). Funnily enough I even have trouble with group settings at academic conferences - I'm very quiet in those settings. Much prefer 1-on-1, which suits OLD. Probably above average physically - like playing sports and work out regularly.
my experience as inexperienced-stem-phd: OLD was great for learning basic social skills such as choosing an appropriate activity, asking someone out, talking about myself, staying in communication, etc. Over the course of a year in NYC, I went on ~20 first dates, ~5 second dates and am now in a serious-ish relationship of a few months. I definitely felt that I was constantly improving over the course of this year, I cringe when I think of the things that I did early on. However I do also remember that it the first 19 dates seemed hopeless and did not think that I was close to getting into a serious relationship, it was really the matter of meeting the right person at the right time.
oh hi, thanks for sharing.
glad to hear it's worked well for you!
are you saying you didn't have much experience with dating prior to this short engagement with OLD?
20 dates to a relationship is pretty good, folks I had in mind with the "try something else" message often have been on this thing for years and years.
curious whether your current partner is quite similar to you (eg stem chinese phd dating stem chinese masters) or more different (eg stem jewish phd dating arts student chinese)?
curious where you'd put yourself in terms of social skills/emotional maturity in general? as in, some stem phds are on the spectrum and struggle getting more basic social connection protocols correctly, while some are upper-middle class americans who are quite well-adjusted and might've been to engineering frat etc.